Something that has come up quite a lot recently with people I’ve been sharing with, is the question of “what is best for all?”.  You know, I’m doing what is best for me, but is that automatically best for the rest of this crazy universe… and does it matter?

This question comes from people doing what’s best for them, regardless of the potential consequences/fallback for everyone else. In the big wide world, decisions are made on a daily basis that benefit a small minority and impact on the most vulnerable in society. Now that’s just not fair or right, am I right? That’s why we have been signing petitions, using social media and demonstrating at rallies/protests. We want fairness.

When we go into the spiritual community, where we align ourselves with the universe, do the same logic and rules apply? I would love to say open-heartedly a resounding “Yes”, but I don’t think I truthfully can. We want fairness for us. Everyone else? “They are on their own journey/path …”

How we get confused/Tricked

This is where I believe there is the trickster at work here, embellishing things so that we don’t take responsibility for our own actions- the consequences of how we carry ourselves. We can use spirit/guides/messengers as an excuse to break plans and commitments to others, very similar to the ‘meant to be trap’. Knowing that you are a powerful and important being, ruling yourself as your own King/Queen can lead to forgetting that everyone else is also running around, ruling themselves as their own King and Queen too.

One trick is to use the phrase ‘go with the flow’ to cover up flakiness or a lack of appreciation for someone else’s time, efforts and resource. When we say spirit wants “what’s best for me”, that sounds (to me) like it is coming from the ego. Spirit wants what is best for all of us, not just me or just you! That’s why we get the messages and the abundance and the lessons, they’re for the betterment of all. We are the ocean and each drop is equally valuable.

Selfishness masquerading as Selflessness

One of the biggest fantasies in the spiritual community is that we are all acting selflessly, giving everything to others and neglecting out own needs to do this. “We are all givers”, we often acclaim.

Not true of all, but it can often be a wondrous illusion as selfishness replaces selflessness:

– we constantly change plans, breaking commitments, regardless of the impact on others. If we are constantly breaking commitments, perhaps we should ask why we make the commitment in the first place (sense of duty, nothing else to do that day, intimidated into saying ‘yes’) and learn to say no in the first place if it not right.

– we martyr ourselves to do something for other people, expecting recognition and respect in return. We can get upset if we don’t get the required adulation or recognition because that’s why we were doing it in the first place- for the recognition. There’s nothing wrong with giving and helping others- that’s what I believe we’re on this planet to do, to work together. That’s the trick, working as a team, not a bunch of individuals on their own solo mission.


Sometimes, it may appear what is best for all is not what you feel is best for you right now. Sometimes the light and fluffy road isn’t going to get you the desired outcome, or actually help other people. Try disconnecting the ego and connecting to spirit take action. It may mean that you do something that isn’t apparently the best for someone else at the time i.e. you need to take action that helps someone else by to not physically or emotionally helping them. Or, it could mean helping someone when you are indifferent or just don’t want to.

This is where tuning in to spirit/guidance is deeply important, take a step back, breathe and disconnect from your ego and connect with your spiritual connection (source). Get the lowdown for what the other person truly needs as well as what you need. From that place, we can do things the right way, no need to be an arse, we can truly do this from a place of love and respect.

If you are connecting up to source and truly in the flow of betterment for all, the right things will happen. You won’t be martyring yourself or doing anything that is wrong for you to do, It just might not be obvious at the time.

So there you have it, I guess! Doing what’s best for you can be selfish, but it doesn’t have to be- especially if you are in the real, true flow of the universe!

Take care, injoy, inlight and inlove

Phoenix 🙂


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